My Christmas 2009 Early Gift to Myself: A Volkswagen GOLF GTI :)

 

 

(plate number crushed out for privacy)

We work like horses everyday, natutulog pa ang mundo gising na po ako at natutulog na yung mundo  gising pa rin ako..so i believe that i deserve this early Xmas present to myself...thanks to my father who payed 1/3 of the tag!love you pop your the best!

A Nice Kept Noodle Secret: Lan Zhou La Mien

This noodle house has been shared with us by my cousins who lives in Binondo. The Binondo area has a lot of small Chinese restaurants right now opened by newly arrived mainland China immigrants. The food they serve is refreshingly authentic to the region they come from with unbelievably cheap prices.

Lan Zhou serves dao shao mian or knife cut noodles. The name daoxiao mian, or knife-shaved noodles, refers to the way the noodles are prepared. The cook holds a large ball of dough in his left hand and, with a knife, deftly and quickly slices shavings of dough into a large pot of boiling water.

You can watch the cook through the glass window dividing the kitchen from the dining area. The Chinese lady pulls and tosses the lump of dough transforming it into pasta.

La Mien noodles - The specialty of the house Php 70. The noodles are fantastic – chewy and doughy. Best d@#n chinese noodles I’ve had in Manila. The broth is flavorful and made from real beef bones.

Bowls of chopped spring onion and coriander, chili garlic sauce and bottles of soy sauce, and black vinegar are on every table to place in your bowl of noodle soup.

Dumplings Steamed - Not-too-thick wrappers enclosing a filling of pork and Chinese chives. Served with shredded ginger in black vinegar.

Everyone should have a try of Lan Zhou. The noodles are so fresh, springy and chewy. Beats any other bowl of Chinese noodle soup out there.

Lan Zhou La Mien
819 Benavidez Street
Binondo, Manila
Tel : 2445365

me?An Alpha Female? : Hmmmmm....

Today I was called an Alpha Female by a work colleague, actually the 4th time already i was described by that term in the past especially in the workplace I'm still not quite sure if it was a compliment. But I conducted research and I decided that I can embrace this role or term.

Alpha Female is the dominant female in a group. She tends be very sarcastic and playful. This woman is strong and very confident. In relationships, she will date as many men as she wants. She is all for passion and is usually attracted to Alpha Male (maybe her weakness).

Alpha Females are intelligent women and problem solvers. But they are often misunderstood by Beta Males (weak males).

What most people don't understand is that I do know when to be a puppy and when to be a pitbull. As far as men, I have no problem being a powerful yet submissive woman if I think you are worthy... <3

After him....

+ I drowned myself with work, one time i worked from 7 am till 12 midnight..Just to keep myself busy...exhausting!

+ I don't read local dailies anymore from our place i don't wanna read something that could remind me of you. I only read summaries by my staff.

+ Still i dont smoke. After you, didnt went back, i tried but everytime I take a sip i can still remember you saying you dont like girls who smoke....

+ I drink everynight before i sleep, coz no matter how tired i am if i dont drink i cant sleep. Ill just spend the whole night thinking about you.

+ Turned into a semi-vegetarian. I dont know why i did this.

+ I rarely go out anymore. For two months i went out only thrice. I lose appetite to it, i better work my ass off. And i dont like it when people ask me about my once nice love story.

+ Sold most of my well-loved stuffs. I just feel like having a brand new life.

+ I stopped lighting three candles after mass, Im not brave enough to do it...A month ago i tried in thesame church we go to..I broke down.

+ I dont eat pops or sundaes anymore...It taste PAINFUL.

+ For over a month i never opened my side drawer, coz there are all the cards you gave me. Someday I will...

+ I still put a framed picture of you in my office desk, but transferred it at my back now i selom twirl back my chair.

+ My weight is in yo-yo mode..their aare days i dont wanna eat and their are those that i just wanna eat the whole day...

+ I went back swimming or jogging every morning and took up kick boxing. kick boxing helped me relieved all the hurts i have felt.

+ I transferred house. I just wanna change my life.

+ I drive  with windows down coz when its up i tend to cry.

+ I still break down everytime i shower...It feels good to cry hard in the shower...when you go out no one will know you cried.

+I feel lost i dont know how to plan my future. i dont even know where to spend christmas, ijust take one day at a time...

+ Sometimes i spend 30 minutes a day staring your pic...asking you " what were you thinking that you did this", many questions left unanswered...

+ I still wear the eternity ring in my right middle finger, to remind me what ive been through in life...

+ I kept the engagement ring. :( Someday when the pain is gone..ill return it...before my last day will come ill give it back to you and tell you how i felt after all of this.

+ I know i deep down i still love you, i did moved on yet.......... :( I dont know if i can. Its just too painful.

"It's amazing how someone can break your heart, but you still love them with all the little pieces."

TRUST....will never be in my dictionary...ever.

You see THAT girl, yeah her.
She seems so invincible right.
but just touch her & she'll flinch.
She has secrets & she trusts no one.
she's the perfect example of betrayal.
cause everyone she trusted, broke her...

Trust no one, tell your secrets to nobody and no one will ever betray you. 

A Week in Her Shoes ;p

" my working wendy shoes by aerosoles"

"I have a funny career! Right after high school graduation i knew what i wanted to be but i also knew what i am going to be after college, but due to some realistic and practical reasons i landed the latter part... ;p I didn't have straight college degree from a prestigious or respected university. It was a mixture of something i love to do for the moment, got in a business course but later quit because accounting freaks the sh** out of me, so i took another one somewhere far away the course i really wanted AB History, it was a short program just over a year and i got my AB certification but its equivalent is already an AB degree here like your POLSCI,then spent a summer with my father in norway got a pre grad school program in INTL ECON!weeee! great!yahoo! weird!when i went back ...i planned to take accounting classes coz my aunt wont hire me coz i cant read numbers,lol...but never succeeded it bore me to death, instead i took subjects in an diplomatic course and maybe try to veer out from my destiny.....but sadly i cant..i was born to be in the world of marketing,pr and ads justs like my aunt coz they said im just like her...anyway,been part-timing for her for the past years ...there where i learned the ins and outs of this crazy world of ours..."

FAST FORWARD 2009>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

2009 was my life's turning point. The firm that I and my 4 other friends/cousins turned 3, this was the year too that we got our SEC certification as a corporation then become independent from my aunt's firms, well even though most of our clients was passed over by our mother firm still we are still proud to maintain a firm ground in this very competitive industry. This year too is the year we transferred to our permanent HQ from makati where we share with our other friends  an relative's companies now we have our own in ortigas. ;p It will be our home this coming years....

The firm wasn't only our life we have other business interest too big or small it always keeps us in our toes.  We handle people in politics for PR and this is the start of the crucial days (6 months to go before election time), this is one of the most difficult field in our job, you read all the newspapers national/local to PCIJ Journals, watch local news (it sucks if the news is in local dialect, you have it translated with a staff who knows the dialect whether its  cebuano,chabacano or illonggo you have to watch the news and of course our world stops during evening news and we listen attentively and sometimes if our client is the news superstar grab a pen and start taking notes if we are in a resto during that time we know the art of writing on a tissue paper without tearing it! I tell you politicians sleeps while we think for them, and ensure their victory for 2010.We travel to their place 2-3 times a week just to grasp the local feel and study the political scene, do surveys, do issue troubleshooting, image build up, publicity, political analysis, and make recommendations, actually what we really o is make our candidates win by hook or by crook. This 2010 will be my first and last year to handle political client accounts, its not that i don't like it actually i love the challenge but their are reasons i can't explain and im concentrating more on product ads and marketing, not anymore in PR, this year ill give my best farewell shot in PR. 

Marketing either by goods or services is difficult we define it as He plants the seed but we should do everything to  make bear fruits and he reaps them!haha...joke! We make sure your business will flourish! :) Under this we have the most number of accounts it reached 307 brands ranging from soap to restos to food chains to uhmm clothes. :) We made sure people recall your brand, so we have people who watch TV all day tally air times and brand identification( how many times it was thanked by artists, as well as every program's end credits), well i do that too sometimes...

Ads? I guess that's my forte, right now i work per project for ALV and Ace Saatchi&Saatchi under the management of the firm. Ads is fun, i can express my feelings in it, i can be as creative as i want to..for now i did 2  tri-media and 16 print, and still 23 projects hanging to be done before december one, the yuletide season floods advertising with projects... :) Im still a little worm in the Advertising Industry and still has lot of rice to eat to perfect the art of advertising...

 A week in my life is crazy! And if you wanna be in my Aerosole shoes you have to promise yourself that you wont give up coz giving is not an option nor commiting suicide.hahaha...you have to be tough! Aerosole shoes are god sent, i have only one pair and its in black so that it suits whatever im wearing for that day, whether im in slacks or in jeans, im in aerosoles most of the time in a workday i just change shoes for meetings, and if im out, but during war times im with my black aerosoles! ;p 

My shoes saw every second of my work every contract signed, the month's payroll signed, every day's income audited, every tear for a wrecked project, every turned down portfolios, every congratulations note, every project termination letter, every sinking survey, piles of piles of newspaper reviewed, cd after cd of presentations, heard an hour sermon our client to us...its really crazy out here! On a Monday we rush to our 10 am jump start briefing from there we now have an idea what our week will be if its a breeze in the park or a trip to hell back and forth.Well this past weeks was the latter one and according to our TIME LINE it will continue till JULY 2010...goodluck to us!......for the rest of week you cant say your sched: its unstable as the Philippine weather, we eat breakfast from another city then be back in our office chair by siesta time reading portfolios...we are literally everywhere..i tell you everyday is a space shuttle ride here! You will learn the art of reading a newspaper while watching tv, while typing your paperwork, while eating your breakfast! We are the gods and goddesses of Multi-tasking. Doing one work at a time is silly!

too many stories to tell you about my aerosoles shoes but its 1am an i have a plane to catch tomorrow...GODSPEED!..this is a preview of a week in my shoes...more to come! ;p 

Cigarette Butts and Empty Vodka Bottles..Welcome to our Table!

In a life filled with stress and drama, every once in a while we need a break, a vacation or sometimes even a good slap on the face. This is what my breather blog is all about---what twentysomethings do to momentarily break free from their complex lives or to keep themselves sane in this seemingly chaotic world.

My friends/cousins and I usually drink or smoke (socially/moderately though i already quits smoking for keeps!) either at a friend's house or at a local bar to simply chill out and relieve stress, not to mingle and dance in tables tops or be seen, (lol,hindi kami yan). It's during this times when we talk about everything and sometimes, even nothing at all.

We once had a conversation on the phenomenon of  "the missing lighter". Don't you ever wonder sometimes why you keep losing your lighter (but not your Zippo)? You dont seem to remember or who last borrowed it. You either buy your third lighter for the week or borrow from the person who probably lost yours. Then after several days, you find two Crickets in the back seat of your car or perhaps underneath all the ruble in your humongous tote--- and neither one of them is yours. It could actually come to a point when you'd just rather buy the one with a naked woman's picture on it, so no one would even think of stealing it. As for me, nothing beats them hotel matches...very timeless...

At times, when there's nothing much to talk about, we subconsciously find ourselves people-watching. We watch the people pass by our table. We check out what they're wearing, how they walk, who they're with, and if we're close enough, even listen in on their conversations. We don't make fun of them nor backbite them, really its not our forte, and those conversation only revolve in our table and never left. We just creatively concoct the stories of their lives just like a guessing game of their lives  because theirs seem more interesting than ours or  our lives was just too depressing to talk about on a night of good drinks and nice company(save the drama in our office pantries and at home!lol). And the fun part of it all is checking out who's hot and who's the forst one to shout, "savee!". Actually, it's suppose to be "touch and save", but we never really had the nerve......

A new topic always begins as the next round of drinks is served. A favorite one among my friends is the 'what the f*ck questions or asking where-the-hell-did-that-question-come-from?, these non-sensical questions can be so absurd yet so much fun to answer. Some memorable lines include....what would your rather suffer from: minor seizures everytime you make love or an exxagerated lisp?which would you rather do: lick the armpit of the guy sitting closest to you or a freezing pole?If you were starving to death and all you had was your kid brother's school bag, which would you eat first: the notebook paper or the paste?...you'd be surprised by my friend's answer and how they even tried to defend it... ( Notebook paper, because it contains less carbs than paste---bene, my chubbylicious cousin explained.)

With good friends, you never really have to try hard. Conversations dont always have to be intellectually stimulating. Just about anything is worth talking about. Sometimes, even the most nonsensical of conversations actually turns out to be the most interesting.

Times like this, what we leave behind aren't just cigarette butts and empty vodka bottles, but remnants of good times and good conversations shared with GOOD FRIENDS!

The letter I wrote to Him... :(

People ask me
Why I chose you

Why—in spite of the
Many choices
Out there—
It had to boil down to
You

You who they could not
Pin down
You who they could not
Understand
You who they could not
Fully see.

And I, too, wonder
Sometimes
Why—in spite of the
Many choices
Out there—
It had to boil down to
You

Just you.


It is then when
My heart speaks to me
In a language that I had
Almost forgotten
But understood
Perfectly well
That night we saw each other
After hundreds of buried dreams,
After thousands of moons.

It tells me to remember
The joy of recognition—
The serenity of knowing
That the soul has found
Its peace,
Its love,
Its home.

It reminds me to look back
On that night
When I sought out my
Future
And saw it shining
In your eyes.

It sings to me
The melodies of your soul,
The tunes that travel
Out through your hands
And into my heart—
Holding me,
Caressing me,
Healing me.

My heart knows
What my mind sometimes
Forgets—
That in the silence of the
Night,
In the stillness of my
Soul,
My life is most at peace
When you are in it.

Because when my soul
Searched the earth
To find a home
It decided to be born
On the same day as yours.

Because when I first cried out
To the Universe
And asked to be led
To the one,
All roads led me
To you.

Because when I strayed and insisted
On finding my own way
I was led back to the place
Where I would find
You.

Because when I asked the Heavens
For just one more miracle
It shone the light
On your face
And told me to come home
To you.

Only you.


So now when people ask me
Why it had to be you,
I will tell them
To look back
To a time
When they believed in dreams
When they believed in miracles
When they believed in Heaven

And they will understand
That they will never fully understand
The inner workings of the soul
But they will know what it means
When it’s their own time
To find love,
To find peace,
To come home
To The One.

 

reading this again now feels really awful.

Now i could truly say, "Been there,done that."

"You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true."

•  I know how it feels to spend years chasing your dreams and end up realizing it will always just be a dream. I maybe doing good in my job right now but this wasnt my dream.
• I know how it feels to be betrayed by a friend. Someone you trust so much with all your good intentions just to betrayed in the end.
• I know how it feels working for 64 hours like a horse and your papers will just be thrown in the trash bin in front of you. Yes! No matter how many good projects I have done, I've been through that.
• I know how it feels to be told in my face I'm not good and smart enough.
• I know how it feels to be duped financially. I have been so generous that people expect me to carry all their financial woes coz we hang-out everyday, and to save face they literally transfer their obligations to you and when its payback time they will just get mad and destroy you. Well God Bless you guys. Thank you for teaching me never to trust again.
• I know how it feels when your home is broken and you just wanna plan your whole day without including HOME in your itinerary. You just wanna face the reality that no one's home.
• I know how it feels to drink from after-lunch until the next morning coz you invested your whole saving to a venture that went to a flop!
•  I know how it feels to have 50pesos in your pocket and a cut-off post-paid plan.
• I know how it feels to be called the EX of so many guys, if their are days that we will have dinner together and watched movie with you..It doesn't mean we have something. And don't ego-tripped when I deny it, I have the right. I wont lie just to save your ego.
• I know how it feels to feel lost. Like your driving from tip to tip and nowhere to go, you just wanna find yourself.
• I know how it feels to smoke packs after packs just to calm your nerves.
• I know how it feels to drink vodka with your dinner, coz you consider it as your water, you just wanna be numb.
• I know how it feels when your family let you down but that what taught me to be strong and to be brave.
• I know how it feels to attend a burial of your love ones and not a single tear fell, coz your tear ducts have been drained out.
• I know how it feels to drive your car 150 and crash it hard.
  
• I know how it feels when people make up stories about you and you cant do anything about it and just wish they are all mute. Well what can you do its their passion!
• I know how it feels really feel that you still have sisters after decades of just seeing them and not feeling them.
• I know how it feels to feel so good that all your hard work paid-off! I know the feeling of depositing your first cash savings that was a product of sleepless nights, nerve-wracking risks, and a 10000000 tons of perspiration.
• I know how it feels when no one seems to believe or had faith that you could make it!
• I know how it feels when a family turned back on you. Same family names does not assure alliances for life,people has their own motives.
• I know how it feels to fight for the one you love, against all odds.
• I know how it feels to sit on a plane and your seatmate is staring at you pitifully coz tears streams down on your face like Dam door opened during a storm because you are leaving a place and left half of your soul there.
• I know how it feels to gain so much weight and everyone reminds you of it, you just don't wanna go out anymore.
• I know how it feels when you helped someone so much and the next thing you knew is he/she denied your existence.
• I know how it feels to visit his facebook/friendster account every quarter of the day coz thats the closest you could get.
• I know how it feels when people talk lowly about you and see you as a small individual just because you look plain and doesnt fulfill their appearance expectations not knowing that what they have achieved in life is just a 0.20 of what you had achieved, you just dont brag about it.
• I know how it feels to lose your long-time wish, miscarriage is  the worst thing that could happen to you, its not easy and it leaves you a permanent wreck in your self.
• I know how it feels to consume 3 hours of your therapist's time. One hour crying, One hour saying nothing and another hour just hugging her tight.
• I know how it feels to go to your hair salon everyday, have a haircut and all their treatments, get a massage everyday twice a day and shop till your CC got denied; coz you just feel so awful.
• I know how it feels to cry to sleep every night. Memories just kept flashing in your ceiling.
• I know how it feels to meet someone who taught you how to trust and love again but eventually made you realized too to tear permanently the word trust and love in your dictionary.
  
• I know how it feels to be so in love, to give everything your heart has to give. Straightened up your life and be the best for him.
• I know how it feels to be proposed on, that moment where your life was put on hold and every thing just feels so right, that you cul remember every detail of it for the rest of your life.
• I know how it feels when your whole heart crashed!!That you can trade half of your career just to saved it, and it feels worst if it crashed for the wrong reasons. After that you realized you left your heart with him forever, and could never take it back...
  

 

---I cant believe i went out all of this alive, it looks easy in this words but if you are  there with me throughout all of this you will break down  matter how tough you build your fortress around you.....my story will always be an ASH to PHOENIX story..---

 

 

at this young age I can always say "BEEN THERE, DONE THAT."