HELLO WORLD! :p

My site will be under construction...  :P

Thank you stalkers!

Much love and kisses, Ching!

Moving on... for real.

Over a year ago this month, my life changed forever.

Looking back I was so amazed how did I survived that crazy year. I was in an incubator of heartbreak and heartache...a resilient, spirited, feisty female who rose from the ashes of the destruction of everything she’d known and got busy on the construction of a journey into the unknown. 

It was a hard process of letting go... unimaginably hard.

I cried myself to sleep almost every night for six months.

Vodka as my breakfast smoothie.

Visited my psychiatrist every other week.

Used my Facebook as therapy.

cook and bake endlessly.

get lost in Japan.

listen to sad music.

wear black all the time.

worked like a dog.

reformatted my career.

live unhealthily.

never attended a single wedding of my friends and relatives.

been really that bitter with life....

One day... I received a letter from our former office intern, she was expressing how thankful she was to me for being her mentor... that smacked me back to reality, that I was wasting the life I have worked so hard for... A man is not a good reason to ruin it...I may not be that perfect person but that letter assured me that if one man didn't see my worth, well maybe a dozen more appreciated me for who I am. :)

This is how to move on for real...You take a deep breath, you say the words that you never imagined yourself saying, and you walk away.... Battle-scarred and scared and unsure about the future as you may be…when you KNOW in your heart that this is not the person God and the Universe intended for you to be with…there is no other option but to walk away.... You cannot allow yourself to settle for a party of two that you know is wrong just because the place settings and his name on the invitation next to yours look nice.... Leaving the comfortable shell of a long-term relationship is one of the scariest things a person can do…but think about it…what would happen to the butterfly if she refused to exit her cocoon? She would never grow…never change…never acquire her wings.....I want to encourage those of you currently going through a heartbreak, or a break-up, or a transition from two birds of a feather to flying solo: There IS happiness on the other side of goodbye. That’s what the sad movies and songs forget to tell you. After the pain comes the rain…and after the rain…comes the sun! And before you know it, everything’s coming up daisies again. One year ago today I was alone, and uncertain, and lonely, and sad. I remember wandering the rooms of my house feeling like the silence was almost palpable. There were even moments that I doubted I made the right decision. But before I knew it, something miraculous happened. I SMILED AGAIN! And then I laughed again! And then I reconnected with my friends and made new ones and started chasing my dreams and doing ME and having fun and setting new goals and realizing something so incredible about myself that had somehow gotten lost in the shuffle of the sorrow, and the hurt, and the tears. I AM STRONG. I am worthy. And “I am looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love. And I don't think that love is here.” (Sex & the City)

And then it hit me. I had to say goodbye to HIM, so I could say hello to ME.

So, my friends, and especially my friends who are currently nursing a broken heart…you must remember this, if nothing else: You will find your smile again. You will get your groove back. You will love again. And you will be able to take where you’ve been and use it as a road map for where you’re going...and for where you’ll never go again. I did. And though I know in my heart I will never revisit him, or that version of me, again…I also know I wouldn’t have missed it for the world. Because he helped create me. Every tear, every piece of my broken heart, every second of pain…are all colors on the canvas of my life. That relationship didn’t DEFINE me. It helped REFINE me. The ashes of the girl I used to be turned me into the diamond of the woman I am today.

I know its not easy....take tiny little steps to the end.

love xoxo, ching

If You Look Hard Enough

You know what I'm learning? Men come and go, things change, seasons change, people change, hearts break, the truth is sometimes overshadowed by lies, friends let you down, the tears come, the storms beat down, you wake up on the wrong side of the bed, the journey is sometimes lonely, love doesn't always conquer all, life isn't always fair, sometimes your bread gets soggy before you've finished the sandwich, not every sentence has a period, the road doesn't always lead home, not all dogs go to heaven, sometimes two wrongs DO make a right, dreams don't always come true, the sun doesn't always shine, the movie theater is almost ALWAYS cold, the superhero is only a man in a silly red sheet, and God doesn't always open a window every time He closes a door...

BUT...

After every rainstorm, you can find the rainbow...if you look hard enough. :)

Chocolates and my Heart.

Maitre Chocolatier Boutique Cafe

white chocolate strawberry mousse (P237)

Dont wanna eat it parang sayang yung presentation. it was so goood! Will visit them again soon!

Roast Beef Panini

- with carrots, zucchini and mozzarella (P185)

One of  two non-chocolate in the menu and the other one is a soup...it taste just soso...

Complimentary Dark Chocolate Tartlets

Visit them at:


Maitre Chocolatier Boutique Cafe
Unit 2A, No. 28 Jupiter Street corner Astra Street
Bel-Air, Makati
Tel. nos.: 897-8559 / 896-2529


!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!

How's my heart?

Type. Control A. Delete.....Sorry still can't talk about it, hindi pa kaya. Too Painful.

KAKANIN OVERLOAD!

If you’re a Filipino living abroad, please do not continue reading this entry. Coz you will just suffer from home sickness attack!

I’m always tuned in to the Discovery Travel and Living channel (Channel 26 on Destiny Cable) and I simply love the food-related travel shows like Anthony Bourdain’s No Reservations (isn’t it the coolest TV show on earth?). I sometimes feel quite sad when he features the cuisines of Indonesia or Singapore and falls in love with the local foods that he even considers retiring in those Asian countries. I wonder why our islands’ culinary treasures have not been given a well-deserved exposure in the international scene. And I’m not just talking about adobo, dinuguan and balut. Coz when Anthony Bourdain visited our country he missed a lot of good stuff but instead he was treated with some fusioned Filipino Cuisine! :) Well the same goes with MR. Andrew Zimmern of Bizarre Food. Guys you missed a lot!

Our native cakes and delicacies like suman (sticky rice), puto and bibingka (rice cakes) are just a few things that will always be part of our rich culinary heritage that we can really be proud of. Here are some of my favorites:

Back in the old days, puto bumbong was considered a Christmas specialty because it was usually associated with Simbang Gabi. These days, however, puto bumbong can be enjoyed all year round–thanks to reliable Filipino restaurants like Kamayan, Mangan, and Via Mare. This Pinoy delicacy with a distinctly bright purple color is made from a mixture of glutinous rice and ordinary rice then steamed in hollow bamboo tubes known locally as bumbong, hence the name. Once cooked, it is topped with margarine, grated coconut and sugar and is best served with a cup of warm salabat (ginger tea). Puto bumbong is a delicious treat that is definitely here to stay. (Puto bumbong in photo is from Bon Appetit, Rustan’s Makati.)

Without a doubt, the best pichi-pichi in town is from the Amber chain of restaurants. Amber specializes in pancit malabon, but it has become even more popular for its pichi-pichi with a very soft, gelatinous texture. The remarkably subtle yet amazing flavor of each ball comes from the humble cassava and freshly grated coconut. On occasion, our family buys hundreds of these little gems (P2.50/piece) for our Sunday get-togethers because it’s kind of addicting–I can gobble up 6 to 12 pieces of pichi-pichi in one sitting, and that’s just for dessert. *grin* But if you happen to be from Iloilo, the pichipichi from Biscocho House and from small burger house in Arevalo also deserves some applause! :)

Growing up in a small city, I called them kalamay. But here in Manila, they’re collectively known as kakanin–those sticky native cakes that are prepared almost the same way but each with a unique taste. There’s sapin-sapin, so called for its layers of different colored rice cakes, most commonly purple, red and white or yellow. There’s also kuchinta, which is made with flour, brown sugar, water and lihiya (lye). Cassava cake, biko, mais and ube (purple yam) are just some varieties of kakanin that I enjoy eating and cannot be found anywhere else in the world (I think). All these yummy treats are now available in one bilao from Dolor’s Kakanin of Malabon. Dolor’s is fast becoming a household name when it comes to these traditional cakes because of its consistent quality and taste. Good thing they can now be found on the ground floor of SM Makati (Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays) so we don’t have to go all the way to Malabon when a craving strikes. A small bilao of the assorted kakanin sells for P125; the medium-sized tray for P140; and the large one for P210. A small slice of the kakanin is very heavy in the tummy but it is a source of comfort, especially when there’s enough latik or budbod that goes with it. Mmmmmm…. One bite of kakanin makes one feel right at home.

Now if you’re a Filipino living abroad and you’ve reached this point and you find yourself drooling and suddenly missing our native delicacies (and the Philippines even), don’t say I didn’t warn you. :)

Sunday Night Dinner: Roast Chicken with Gravy :)

Roasting a chicken is a mess of feelings. For me, the sight of a large bird alludes both family warmth - the communal aspect of carving and gravy - and my own singular romantic fascination with the subject. Fingers delve in way before it's time to properly eat with forks. The licking of fingers is almost mandatory. The chicken is a specimen that needs to be checked and loved. On the other hand, I have no idea how to roast a chicken even though i have roasted a dozen of birds to date still its a guess and check game for me always, despite many assurances that it's a no-brainer. It made me a nervous wreck mid-way through. I basted it every other minute.

The confusion comes from the bird itself, which sits there whole. Quite simply, it looks like...a chicken. The flesh moves like a living creature, and the cold touch feels eerie. It can wave at you. You know exactly where it came from. This thing used to be an animal. You’ll want to name it.

But a curious feeling arises when handling an intact animal, and it’s all about the love, baby. I massaged that bird with softened oil, patted its innards with spices, and coaxed its flavor out. I would have been truly heartbroken had I overcooked its tender flesh by a mere minute. Luckily I had a passionate Francophile (Anthony Bourdain via the Les Halles cookbook) in my corner, whose gruff instructions helped turn my limp bird into delicious, succulent meal.

Hello, there. The first step to perfectly roasting a chicken is to get acquainted with the subject. At first I hid it underneath the wrapping when chopping and prepping, like I was ashamed that it might see me. But the only way to really get the chicken to do what you want is to get personal. You'll be shoving lemons and such inside its cavity short enough. Don't get squeamish.

First, remove the packet of giblets that the butcher so nicely laid inside and side aside. It needs a good rinse, to get ready for the festivities. Run cold water into the cavity and pat dry with a paper towel. Then take a nice pinch of salt and pepper and rub the inside down. Now it's time.



1 whole chicken, about 4 lbs


1 lemon


1 onion


1 sprig fresh rosemary


1 sprig fresh thyme


5 tbsp butter


1 1/2 cups white wine


A little chopped parsley


From Anthony Bourdain's Les Halles Cookbook


Before you start manhandling the love bird, preheat the oven to 375 degrees. It's good to get the veggies cut and ready to go, and luckily that takes all of about 1 minute, for you just need to halve the lemon and onion and pluck one spring of the rosemary off. (Note: I was out of thyme. Rustans Supermarket was out of thyme, the thyme in my lil herb garden is just 2 merely two inches tall. I know I could have found some in other stores, but I had a chicken under my arm, and it was much easier just not to.)

"Okay...now, I'm not going to try and explain how to truss a chicken with twine." You're not? Bourdain sure doesn't. He does go into a quick and easy method where you cut right under the heel of one of the legs and slide the other one in. Sounded simple. An hour later I was trying decipher the passage for its meaning. Not sure quite what to do, and without the proper twine, I went for the only inflammable object I knew could do it right: black thread. It's not a good sight, but it got the job done.

Then shove the onion, lemon, and rosemary into the bird cavity. I ended up needing to cut the half onion into half so everything could fit snugly in place. Liberally salt and pepper the outside and then go at the bird with some softened butter. Really get all the hard to reach spots and evenly get the essential oils everywhere. You'll need about 2 tablespoons, which can be easily softened by leaving it out on the counter, or forgetting to and putting it in the microwave for a few seconds.

In the roasting pan cut the other half of the onion into half and place it on the rack. Then put the wonderful looking giblets on top.

He doesn't give a specific amount of time, but Bourdain suggests basting the chicken every once and while, as well as moving the pan around in the oven to avoid hot spots. I was so nervous I basted every five minutes and shifted the pan every single time I opened up the oven (which was a lot). After the excruciatingly slow 30 minutes have passed, crank the heat up to 450 degrees and watch as the sickly looking bird crisps up to a glorious toasted hue. Cook for 25 minutes more.

Remove the heavenly creation and place on a cutting board, but be still young ones! Let it sit for 15 minutes, which will seem like 30. But that doesn't mean you can't pick off pieces at will.

THEN FOR THE GRAVY! : The secret weapon to this Gravy recipe's success is: The whole time the bird roasted, juices fell into the pan, were evaporated, and turned into glorious brown and black bits. Take a wooden spoon and dislodge them from the pan, pour in a cup of white wine, and place it over medium high heat. Reduce the sauce by half. When the sauce has thickened, remove the onion and giblits and throw away, toss in a tablespoon of butter, and stir in. When the sauce is done put in a little chopped parsley and transfer into whatever fancy gravy saucer you have. :)

Cutting a chicken is freaking hard, as my piss-poor example properly shows. Had I bothered to actually look the right way to go about the delicate business, I would have had some vague idea. But no. I attacked the bird with zeal and a very large knife. I whacked, hit bone, and didn't dislodge anything except a nice spray of chicken juice which ended up all over my poor kitchen counter. At least the chicken was juicy.

Once I disloged a hunk of the meat, I felt okay. I poured the high-powered sauce over everything and sat down to this. A perfectly juicy, succulent, crisped-skin bird. It's just about this time that those feelings of love disappear and the hunger pangs start. Forks start to scratch the plate and busy fingers pick the good parts off the bone. My nephew and my housemates loved it so it must be very good! :)

Love in Time

Love… its going to be the most wonderful, painful, lost time of your life. You’ll do things you never expected to do. You’ll feel things you never felt. Your mind will be lost in a million direction. You’ll have ups and downs, days where you’ll wanna throw your phone through a wall, & days where you’ll float almost to heaven. It’s going to turn you mad, turn you into a monster, but it can also turn your life into one of the greatest stories anyone could ever hear. If you choose to fight for what you love, choose to love the right way then I promise you each battle, each tear, and each scar won’t even matter. 

Mr. Jones - Tuesday Brunch

I insisted on having our brunch kanina at Mr. Jones in Greenbelt 5 because i heard from our office accountant how yummy the food there and i was starving. And I'm so glad I did. Owned and operated by the same group that created Chelsea, MoMo and the Museum Cafe, Mr. Jones is the newest diner that's currently making waves because of its great value-for-money food, hefty portions, and friendly and efficient service. We also love the '50s to '70s music playing in the background, and the restroom is very clean albeit tiny. My only complaint are the annoying flies--we kept shooing the flies away from our food. I hope they do something about pest control because we really want to come back to try the crab & dory thermidor and other items on the menu.

50's style, al fresco dining, animal print couch, cool display jars! --- i love their interiors!

Classic Malt Choco -- P175

Lip Lickin' Seafood Bites n' Chews

- lightly coated fried clams, dory, prawns and calamari served with 4 dipping sauces P375

Crispy Bagels & Salmon

- marinated salmon, creamy salmon mousse and poppy seed onion bagel crisps (P295)

Prawn Bisque

- P195

"Superman Burger"

- P420

- homemade 100% char-grilled U.S. beef patty, cheddar cheese, balsamic sweet onions, hickory barbecue sauce, double smoked bacon, lettuce and tomato on a black and white sesame seed bun with a pickled pepper

- we requested the patties to be well-done so they turned out not-so-juicy but still tasty

Crispy Bagels & Salmon

- marinated salmon, creamy salmon mousse and poppy seed onion bagel crisps (P295)

- this is so good, we wish they'd sell it in jars. We'll order it again on our next visit. :)

crispy bagels and sweet fig marmalade (a complimentary dish)

Hot & Spicy "Shrimp Scampi"

- sauteed in garlic, a little brandy, pepperoncini, garlic chips and Italian parsley served with garlic herb bread (P250)

ENJOY!!!! :p

I said...

you said the harshest words to me, you gave me the most painful feeling that i have felt in my entire life....I lost my self-esteem because of you...

you just don't know how difficult life was.. after you. 

But still i feel the same about you.